#69 Sacrifice

I am a member of a team, and I rely on the team, I defer to it and sacrifice for it, because the team, not the individual, is the ultimate champion. --Mia Hamm

Why do we play sports?  Watch the NCAA tourneys for the next 3 weeks.  Pain...tears...disappointment...yelling...screaming...national embarrassment...universal criticism and second-guessing...uncommon challenges...defeat...loss...End.  Sign me up, right?

Only one team...only one group of individuals...only one set of fans will be happy at the end of it all.  Only a teeny-tiny percentage of those involved and those supporting will have a sense of joy when the late great Luther Vandross finally croons "One Shining Moment".

So why do we play?  Many of you will say "to find out who the best is."  Good answer.  Some may say "for the glory" or "for the win".  Another good answer.  The real reason we play is because of the sacrifice.

I dare you to find me one person on our planet who does the same thing over and over again each day and who is as happy as they can be.  Their efforts change no lives.  Their investment could be done by anyone with a specific knowledge base or skill, and their only purpose is to make a paycheck to pay for their own personal food, habitation and transportation.  What's missing from that life?  Sacrifice.

If you are a parent, your professional life may feel like this, but it is because of that sacrifice you are enabled to feel value in a monotonous professional existence.  You may be living an existence you didn't choose, but if you are doing it to sacrifice for your family, you have self-worth and value because of that sacrifice.  You are making choices that normally you would not have made if it weren't for your internal need to sacrifice for the love you have for others.

If you have never played a contact sport, watch 5 minutes of a game this weekend.  Focus on one player.  Watch everything they do for 5 minutes, and you will see more sacrifice than you can imagine.  They will run, chase, stop and go, hit and get hit, jump and fall, and they will do it all with a billion people watching them around the world.  Most would sprint from that type of sacrifice...that type of internal and external pressure.  These young people.  These coaches.  They do it because the sacrifice for each other is worth every possible bad thing that could inevitably happen...for every extraordinary disappointment that they know is completely expected for 99% of the participants.

Whether you are a soldier, policeman, or fire-fighter who is risking/sacrificing your life to save and protect others, or you are a parent, coach or athlete who is sacrificing their time and personal health to help someone reach their potential, it is sacrifice that drives us to become something bigger, better and more significant.

It is also why our deepest hunger as homo sapiens is the hunger for love, affection and companionship.  We have this unexplained yearning to connect to others, so we can connect to someone in order to sacrifice for that other soul.  In short, we need others in order to understand our own existence.

It is because of this amazing sacrifice that we are all so crazy about filling out a bracket and watching every second of every game.  Even when we are not the one doing the actual sacrificing, the opportunity to connect to the transcendence of another's sacrifice provides us with a euphoria that we will never really quite understand...but boy do we want more of it!

What is the moral of this story?   The NCAA Tournament is another vast reminder of the importance of living, connecting, and taking chances...even when we doubt our self-worth, value, and capability.  As you enjoy every second of the euphoria which will be these next 3 weeks of college basketball, I hope it inspires you to sacrifice to create your own.

Coach Matt Rogers

Twitter:  @madcoachdiary

Email:  coachrogers12@gmail.com

Linkedin:  www.linkedin.com/in/rogersmatt16

Blog:  madcoachdiary.blogspot.com

Phone:  (312) 610-6045

Matt Rogers is a 20-year high school and college coach veteran.  He has led two teams to the NCAA National Tournament and one team to a High School State Championship.  His teams hold numerous school and one NCAA record. He has mentored and coached players at every level while serving as an athletics administrator at the high school and NCAA levels. He has helped numerous players continue their careers at the professional level. He currently is the Head National Scout/Recruiting Specialist for NCSA - Next College Student Athlete where he has helped thousands of young men and women from around the world achieve their dreams of playing at the college level.  Coach presently lives in the Denver, CO area with his wife of 19 years and his two children. 

To request Coach Rogers to speak at your school or event, you can reach him through any of his contact information above.

#68 Your Season Is Over, Now What?

If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, what is the significance of a clean desk? --Laurence J. Peter

Let's be honest...you are tired.  It's been a long season.  You've coached 70-90 practices.  You've coached 20-30 games.  You've taught.  You've encouraged.  You've yelled.  You've celebrated.  You've left the gym devastated.  You're darn right you're tired.  A basketball season is completely physically and emotionally consuming for a coach.  It's not just the practices and the games.  There's the player meetings, practice prep, film sessions, trips to scout your opponents, writing of scouting reports, more film, more one-on-one player meetings, administrative meetings, conference meetings, uninformed parent meetings...It goes on and on and on.

Whether you went 1-24 or you just won the state championship, your body is still running on adrenaline, and you are trying to figure out what to do with the massive amount of time that just fell in your lap.

Now, I know there is equipment and uniforms to collect.  There's a banquet to plan.  There's stats and film to organize.  There's weights and conditioning and summer camps and leagues to create.  There's college prospects on your roster that need help with their recruiting, and there are letters to write and phone calls to make.  I get it.  However, you've got no more practices to plan for 8 months...no more games to prep...no more x's and o's to build.  It's time to breathe.

As Mr. Peter said above, it's time to clear your desk and time to clear your mind.  Today you are a phoenix.  Today is the start of your next renaissance.

You need time to start fresh and for a few weeks, you need to think about you and your family and let basketball be a foreign country a billion miles away.  Make yourself establish some new routines for a while.  Meet a friend for coffee or breakfast once per week.  Start hitting that treadmill at school 3 days a week...even for just 10 minutes.  Take your wife or husband out for dinner on a Tuesday or Friday night.  They don't even know you exist on those nights.  Start a book you've been meaning to read.  Eat dinner with your family every night and actually have a family outing once per week.  Whatever you do, replace the loss with routine that gives you peace and joy and a reminder that you are a human being.

If you are one of those coaches whose desk is always clean and immaculate at the end of the day, I applaud you.  That's impressive.  If you are like the rest of us, you want that clutter created from needing the days to be longer than 24 hours to go away.  Clean your desk.  Clean your office.  Then step back and feel good that you have a clean canvass to start painting your next season again when you are ready.

What's nice about the end of the season is that you now have the power to re-invent yourself.  You can explode from the ashes of last season, and come out flying as a completely new creature.  

Maybe you are finally getting some seniors to graduate who weren't the best leaders.  Maybe you finally will have some size or speed or shooters or scorers or a team committed to running or defensive pressure next year.  Whether you won ZERO games or you won them all, step back, breathe, and start thinking about who you want to be next and what tools do you have to create your very "first" team for the upcoming year.

If you need that guy to have a coffee with or just a chat that will lead to a lot of laughter, give me a call.  Enjoy this time.  You've earned it!

Coach Matt Rogers
Twitter:  @madcoachdiary
Email:  coachrogers12@gmail.com
Linkedin:  www.linkedin.com/in/rogersmatt16
Blog:  madcoachdiary.blogspot.com
Phone:  (312) 610-6045

Matt Rogers is a 20-year high school and college coach veteran.  He has led two teams to the NCAA National Tournament and one team to a High School State Championship.  His teams hold numerous school and one NCAA record. He has mentored and coached players at every level while serving as an athletics administrator at the high school and NCAA levels. He has helped numerous players continue their careers at the professional level. He currently is the Head National Scout/Recruiting Specialist for NCSA - Next College Student Athlete where he has helped thousands of young men and women from around the world achieve their dreams of playing at the college level.  Coach presently lives in the Denver, CO area with his wife of 19 years and his two children. 

To request Coach Rogers to speak at your school or event, you can reach him through any of his contact information above.

#67 The Great Wall

Be the change that you wish to see in the world.  --Mahatma Ghandi

I believe that every person on the planet has a characteristic that defines them.  I do believe mine is empathy.  Having empathy as the center of your character is a blessing and a curse.  I often think of others and their feelings before I think of my own.  My parents raised me to walk in another person's shoes before I make judgments about them or their actions.  That leads me to sometimes forget to sleep and eat and be on time when I promised my wife I would ready.  Empathy has made me a lot of friends, but it also gets me in trouble.

For example, and many of you may think less of me for saying or feeling this, but September 11, 2001 is one of the most vivid memories I have in my life.  It was one of the most heart-breaking and devastating days in our country and in my time.  When word started to circulate what truly happened in those planes, my first thought was "what could we have possibly done to those men to create such hate in their hearts that they would even think these thoughts, let alone act them out?"

I was married and 26 years old at that point.  8 years earlier, my first thought would have been to enlist and immediately join the army.  Their hate would have been met by mine.  At 26, though, I had lived a little.  I had perspective.  I had been married for 4 years and had learned that the world did not revolve around me.  I knew that I had a choice to be a part of the problem or I could choose to be a part of the solution.  My empathy for those who were viciously murdered was overwhelming for months, but my empathy for the families of those who acted out those awful plans was equally overwhelming.

As I look at the landscape of our world, I instinctively worry about my children...and yours.  With those thoughts, I begin to think about those who shaped me.  Outside of my family, I have had two great role models in my adult life.  One is "Mr. Dave", a Dean of Students and an openly gay man, and "Mr. Christopher", an old school college educator and my African-American big brother.

Mr. Dave taught me courage, conviction, and patience.  He also taught me the power of tolerance while showing me that my potential was far greater than I could ever imagine.  He put me in positions of leadership that no one else on our campus wanted.  People ran from the role he asked me to take on.  As hard as it was to be who he wanted me to be, I quickly learned from his guidance and reassurance that I really had no idea who I was and where my values were capable of taking me.  He made me look in the mirror and see that I was not the tiny little village where I grew up.  I was not the majority.  I was not someone who was capable of abusing my power or god-given traits.  He taught me to care for and respect everyone equally whether they were different from me or disagreed with me.  I learned that everyone could become my friend, and I could become theirs.

Mr. Christopher...well, I lost him in a tragic car accident 16 years ago...almost to the day I write this.  You see, there were not a lot of "Hicks" (as I called him) where I grew up.  There were, however, a lot of "hicks", if you know what I mean.  There was not 1 person of color in my high school...not a student...not an educator.  I was lucky to have parents and siblings who made friends with people from all over the world and of all color and faith.  I was raised to have open eyes and to treat everyone equally.  Hicks was my first real boss.  He gave me my first opportunity to lead and teach at the college level.  Just like Mr. Dave, he taught me how valuable tolerance is in every situation and how important it is to always think and ask questions before acting or reacting.  Hicks became my brother.  His strength of conviction and patience and calm in the face of the worst storms will be something I will never let go of.  Of all the people I have lost in this world, he is the angel that is always on my shoulder.  When things get tough, he is sitting there reminding me that no matter how big the storm, the rain and the wind will soon pass, and the sun will show itself again.

If those two people are my professional role models, Rosa Parks is my hero.  I often ask myself if I would have had the courage to sit in the chair next to her.  My empathy tells me that I would.  My brain tells me that she needed to do it alone to truly change the world the way she did.  Do I have the strength as a father to teach my children to be as strong in their convictions and values as Ms. Parks?  I can assure you that I work at it daily.

I am blessed.  With that blessing, I cannot and will not take my blessings and gifts for granted.  Most of you are reading this to learn about college recruiting or becoming a better basketball coach or a better teacher.  My question for you is "Does any of that matter if we allow the weak to be harmed by the strong?"  Can we truly call ourselves educators if we choose not to act?

As you read this, I plead with you to join me in building the greatest of walls.  When we see hate...  when we see fear, will you join me in building a wall around those who can't protect themselves?  Will you join me in being a shield against hate, intolerance, and bigotry.  Will you join me in demonstrating to those who were not raised better that we are willing to sacrifice our blessings, so every person has the right to enjoy life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness?

I promise to always be at the center of that wall.  I promise to be your rock when you are not sure if you are strong enough.  I promise to be your voice of courage and assurance that you are capable of standing strong in the face of that storm.  I promise to still be standing with you when the sun comes back to warm us and greet us with a new tomorrow.

What a wall WE could build...

Matt Rogers